Alberta, Alberta

Alberta, Alberta

Let your blue skies sing

Let your praises ring!

With golden fields

And sunny days

A glorious summer haze!

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Alberta, Alberta

Let your mountains soar

Let their grandeur roar!

With snowy peaks

And glassy lakes

For you my heart aches!

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Alberta, Alberta

Let your wild rose bloom

Let it never meet it’s doom!

With wild, wild flowers

And blushing wild rose

Whom everybody knows!

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Alberta, Alberta

Let your rivers rush

Let the land be lush!

With valleys low

And hills a-rolling

The very sight consoling!

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Alberta, Alberta

Let your freedom roam

Let this place be home!

With emerald lakes, snowy plains

Golden fields and mountains high

Always under your blue sky!

Ah, what home means to us! The grandeur! The life!

Just kidding. In all honesty, this was a wee bit of a dare. Somebody asked me to write a pompous poem. ‘About anything?’ I asked? ‘Anything’. They said. ‘Just make it as fancy-pants as possible’.

So I sat down to write something. What could I write about? Top Hats? Will and Kate? William’s Nude Photos? Prancing Unicorns?

Unfortunately, none of those really came into play, though the Prancing Unicorn one got pretty far before I realized I sounded like a six year old girl who had just discovered a thesaurus.

What else is pompous? I thought? And suddenly, the American anthem played on the TV I had on in the background… (though, truth be told, NASCAR is hardly fancy and well-to-do.) Then I thought, of course! Write about home! Like a crazy, fancy, Alberta National Anthem type deal. And so, with great speed and pompusness I proceeded. And with a flourish, I finished said poem, then ran off and announced to the challenger; ‘Look at all this fancy pants, well to do, specialness! ‘Look at the fancy words and the ohs and excessive use of exclamation points!’

And so, my challenger read it. And looked back up at me in surprise.

‘Oh,’ they said. ‘I was hoping for a top hat wearing royal unicorn poem…that’s what you would usually write.’

I didn’t think of that…